- May 1, 2018
When you’re married to an abusive partner, whether that abuse is physical, mental, emotional or all 3, the first order of the day is to hide that fact from everyone. You become very adept at disguising your real feelings and emotions when in social settings. During the course of this blog, many friends have reached out to me to express their sadness that I never felt comfortable talking to them while struggling within my marriage. It brings me sadness to think that these kind people feel guilty in some way for not being able to help me.
The truth is that when you’re married to a narcissist and your daily life consists of being belittled and manipulated, you literally live a double life. You become the friend who always wants to help others, you redirect conversations towards them and are always available as a “shoulder to cry on” for your friends. In this way, you’re able to form relationships and function socially. Particularly when you have kids, this is a vital piece of the puzzle that is your facade.
One of the things that I grapple with, even now, 5 years out of my relationship – is the shame. I have always considered myself to be intelligent, and a strong person. If I am those things, how could I have let myself become trapped in my marriage? How could I have children with this person? The guilt and shame are almost a physical weight when you’re in the relationship, and are part of why it is so hard to break free and leave.
It’s a double edged sword, when you’ve built a fake picture of yourself to friends and even family – it’s very hard to admit how bad things are and to ask for help and support as you escape the bad relationship. Part of our intent in writing this blog is for other people who are in these kinds of relationships to realize they aren’t alone and that it’s ok to leave. Once I broke the chains of my silence, I was very fortunate to have a small group of close friends who were always there to help me. To this day, I don’t know what I would have done without them. Don’t be afraid to reach out to friends – you’ll be surprised to find how supportive and understanding most people are. You need your friends now, more than ever!
Please share your story with us at mystory@50fabulousandfinallyfree.com
#Friendships #SelfDoubt #CheatingHusband #Lies #Regrets #Women #WomensStruggles #StandingUpForYourself #Control #ConfidinginFriends #SelfConfidence #Divorce #DivorcingANarcissist #DivorcingASociopath #50Divorced #Diversions #PsycologicalAbuse #VerbalAbuse #BeingAbused #LivingWithAnAbuser #AbusiveRelationship #EmotionalAbuse #PhysicalAbuse #Abuse #Sociopath #MarriedToASociopath #BeingMarriedToASociopath #UnfaithfulSpouse #ToxicRelationship #Deception #Denial #Deceipt #Secrets #EmbarrassingRelationships #ProtectingYourFamilyFromANarcissist #MarriedToANarcissist #BeingMarriedToANarcissist #Narcissist #Narcissistic #Pinterest #Instagram #Facebook
- Apr 26, 2018
Loving: A New Favorite Find
Being the organized freak that I am, I hate having to rummage through a drawer to find something... especially measuring spoons! These measuring spoons stack together with a magnet! They are double sided with two different shapes for use with spice jars or liquids... I love them! These magnetic spoons stay organized in your drawer so they are always right where you need them. Made by Prep works/Progressive, these "Magnetic Measuring Spoons" are available at Amazon.
European Planters
I love flowers and plants. I love everything about them; the colors, smells, the way that they look!
If I could have one luxury, it would be to have my house filled with fresh flowers regularly, but since I can’t, I have mixed European planters instead! You can use these anywhere; kitchen counters, coffee tables, dining table, everywhere and they look beautiful. The more that you have, the better and as always and with almost everything, the bigger the better! Plants can be picked up at Home depot for $2-$5 and will last for months! They are easy to make & maintain and can be made two different ways!
Option 1
*Plants have the ability to grow much larger
Container (anything that you like will do and I think bigger is better!)
Plastic for lining the container
Rocks or Gravel for drainage
Potting Soil
3, 5, or 7 House Plants (enough to make the planter really full, always in odd numbers, with various heights and varieties)
Moss to cover dirt (available at any craft store)
Directions:
Line a container with any thick plastic material.
Add rocks
Add soil
Add plants
Cover dirt with moss
Maintain plants regularly, trimming off dead leaves and lightly dusting plants. Water as directed, but do not over water.
Replace dead/dying plants as needed
Option 2
*Makes it very easy to replace plants as needed
Container (anything that you like will do and I think bigger is better!)
Plastic for lining
Plastic plant trays
Newspaper or plastic for height
3, 5, or 7 House Plants (enough to make the planter really full, always in odd numbers, with various heights and varieties)
Moss to cover dirt (available at any craft store)
Directions:
Line a container with any thick plastic material.
Add newspaper or plastic for height
Add plants with the plastic trays IN their original plastic containers, placing them in their desired location
Cover with moss filling in between each plant to keep it stabilized
Maintain plants regularly, trimming off dead leaves and lightly dusting plants. Water as directed, but do not over water.
Replace dead/dying plants as needed
Enjoy year-round!
#EuropeanPlanters #EuropeanBaskets #FloralArrangements #TableTopPlanters #DIYFloralArrangements #TableTopPlanter #TableDecoratingIdeas #TableDecorating #IndoorPlantersOnABudget #InexpensiveFloralArrangements #Longlasting #SimpleFloralPlanters #QuickFloralArrangements #EasyGifts #Gifts #GiftsOnABudget #DIYGifts
